mommies are human

I remember the first time I lashed out at my baby at the ripe old age of 2 months, the first thing that hit me was the feeling of GUILT. During the entire initial month after the birth, I felt she must reach a superhuman level of strength, patience, stamina, and tolerance. “Being a mother is like that,” they told me. Like what? Like a superhuman?

Not knowing what my baby wanted at that moment made me feel helpless. I tried everything in my power to satisfy him and make sure that her needs were met. Her cry never goes unanswered. I felt this urgent need to make sure that she is smiling and goo-goo and laughing the whole time. The moment he gets fussy, I panic.

Faced with such a difficult situation, mothers often feel powerless and do not know what to do. When they’ve exhausted all the tricks in the positive parenting book, they’ll start to get frustrated. And when the feeling of frustration surfaces, the mother may feel a certain level of guilt for being angry with her innocent baby.

What I am trying to say here is that a mother is also a human being. When she doesn’t know what to do and is feeling a little panicky, it’s okay to ask for help. And when she does, do it with your heart and a willingness to listen. Give yourself a chance to vent your frustrations, to cry, to ask for help, to understand that you don’t know everything, and to embrace the concept that moms need time-out, too.

Perhaps the best thing to do at this point is to take a couple of minutes to breathe in and out, have someone take over (if someone is there), and if you’re alone, cradle or swaddle your baby. until she stops crying and rocking (and her baby back and forth). Just calm down and allow yourself the opportunity to feel angry.

Mothers don’t have to know everything. With the birth of your baby, you don’t have to instantly become a saint. It is allowed to make mistakes and the most important thing is to learn from those mistakes. You can yell, stomp like an angry child who rejects the last cookie before bed, you can call your friends and complain about how fussy your baby is, you can tell your mother that your baby is driving. you on the wall

Don’t feel guilty, but be proud that you’ve come this far. Once you’ve given the emotion a chance to get out of your system, you’ll be in a better position to deal with the real problem.

Happy motherhood!