Test your body language skills

“To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.”

Marilyn Vos Savant

Your face is probably the first physical characteristic that people notice about you. There are “eye people”, “nose people” and “mouth people”. These purists not only notice your face, but are drawn to or deterred by one of your facial features. Personally, I am attracted to the eyes of an individual. The Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory (MBPI) says that INTJs (Introverts, Intuitive, Thinking and Judging Personality Type) do not show the depth of their emotions, except in their eyes. This may be an example that the eyes are the window to the soul. INTJs are 1% of the population. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your perspective), my life is full of them. Consequently, I have become very familiar with his profile and emotions. I have yet to see a discernible depth of emotion in his eyes. Wait, we’ll talk more about INTJ later. However, we try to read the faces of the people with whom we have contact. When you meet someone, what do you notice first? Maybe your gender makes a difference.

Although the face is normally the first part of the body that we observe, the whole body “speaks”. Body language is a substantial part of our communication; some experts say 65 to 80 percent. If your body communicates an emotion and your words articulate something else, you are more likely to rely on body language. For example, if someone says “I love you,” we should be able to discern some genuine emotion or the words sound sacred and unconvincing. Possibly, they were spoken out of habit or kindness.

Behavioral studies indicate that individuals perceive a distance that is appropriate for different types of messages; they establish a comfortable distance for personal interaction and define it non-verbally as their personal space. Personal distance is as much a part of non-verbal communication as a smile or a growl. If you are suspicious (ie paranoia), your space will probably be larger. If you perceive danger (or disgust), even if you are unaware of its perception, the gap between you and the other person will likely increase.

Would you like to know how well you read body language? Choose your favorite answer to the following questions.

Body language test

1. According to research studies, what is the greatest distance you are likely to find between two whispering lovers? (Use your tape measure the next time you see two lovers.)

A) 2 feet

B) 28 inches

C) 4 inches

D) 18 inches

2. This body language tool, when used, will make you appear warm, friendly, open, and confident.

A) Arms extended

B) Feet about 10 inches apart

C) Nodding

D) smile

3. Making little eye contact can mean

A) He’s shy

B) He’s an INTJ and doesn’t want anyone to read emotion in his eyes

C) He is sleepy

D) You don’t like the person

4. If someone wrings their hands while speaking, what could that mean?

A) she is nervous

B) His hands are dirty

C) He is late for something

D) She is open and outgoing

5. When you lean towards the person you are talking to and nod from time to time, it probably means

A) It is myopic

B) It is egocentric

C) You are paying close attention

D) You have trouble listening to the other person.

6. If you have your arms crossed and your legs crossed, it could mean

A) She is cold

B) She feels romantic

C) You want to meet the person you are talking to

D) She is on the defensive

7. Standing tall with your chest out and your head held high can mean

A) Trust

B) Aggression

C) Low self-esteem

D) An ill-fitting bra

8. One leans toward a person if

A) He is being aggressive

B) He thinks she’s cute

C) You are trying to read the emotion in an INTJ’s eyes.

D) He thinks she is lying and wants to see if she is blinking.

9. If you filter your words through your hands, it could mean

A) She is trying to hide bad breath.

B) she is lying

C) She is dramatic

D) She is in love

10. We have such powerful brain “circuits” for facial expressions that

A) We see faces where there are none (i.e. moon, clouds)

B) We often misread expressions

C) We get tired of reading expressions

D) We smile and glare just to confuse people.

Correct answers:

1) d, 2) d, 3) a, 4) a, 5) c, 6) d, 7) a, 8) b, 9) b, 10) a

Punctuation:

Give yourself one point for each correct answer, or as many points as you like, but it will make the scoring confusing.

What does my score mean?

Scores 1-4

I’m afraid you would never survive in the wild. Surely something big, toothy, and hostile would devour you, because you’d think the growl meant he was in love. You may want to learn more about body language by visiting The Non-Verbal Communication Journal website. If that site is too academic for your taste, try the Center for Nonverbal Communication website, it is quite interesting. To be safe, stay close to someone who scored ten points on the test.

Scores 5-8

You are doing relatively well and can probably communicate and understand communication with little effort. You may want to visit the sites mentioned above and increase your knowledge of body language. What does it mean when someone looks up and to the right? Look, I told you there was more to learn.

Scores 9-10

You should work for the FBI. You have unusual knowledge of body language. This knowledge will give you a clear advantage in understanding your peers. Let me warn you that some of the nice people in the first scoring group will be looking for you.

Grand finale

First, I must apologize to the INTJs in my life for attacking them. They are exceptionally intelligent and talented people. They will complete projects (perfectly) and on time, at all times. They are not materialistic; they are theoretical individuals. You’ll find them at parties sitting in a corner reading Einstein’s Theory of Relativity … and smiling.

Who is lying?

Would you like to know how to tell if someone is lying? According to body language expert Robert Phipps, “bulging eyes, non-visible palms, shifting from one foot to the other, a hand covering the mouth, or fingers pulling at the ear are clues.” Sorry, this system is not foolproof.

What do you do if your partner comes home late, smelling of expensive French perfume, and says that he has been visiting his beloved mother? Just to make it more interesting, what if you also tug on your ear, cover your mouth, and take a quick look? Would you call mom? Naturally, just to see how the old man is doing.

The fbi

What does it mean when someone looks up and to the left? Sorry, the FBI will not allow me to release that information. If it is ever declassified, I will let you know. Keep in contact …