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Does your determination to eat sensibly start to crumble when you see those cookies in the bakery window? Does your promise to quit vanish like a puff of smoke at the first hint of a craving? Can you keep your face off Facebook long enough to complete the day’s work?

If you are faced with the temptation of a habit that you want to stop, apply the “ten minute rule” to control the habit. Acknowledge the urge, take a deep breath, and wait ten minutes. If, in ten minutes, you still want the object of your impulses, then go for it. Apply the rule repeatedly and you will see that the desire finally decreases. Neuroscientists have found that the Ten-Minute Rule robs a habit of its immediacy, giving the brain’s reward circuitry time to cool down. In that ten-minute break, you may remember why giving in to that habit is not a good idea.

The ten-minute rule is just a piece of advice you’ll find in Kelly McGonigal’s book, The Willpower Instinct. She is an award-winning psychology instructor who teaches the popular Science of Willpower course at Stanford University. Her book is about that course and the research behind it. If you want more willpower, this book is for you!

Most people cite “lack of willpower” as the main reason they struggle to meet their goals and reach their potential. Also, most of the methods that people resort to for self-control are ineffective. McGonigal’s course and her book provide scientific insights into practical strategies that can help people kick their unwanted habits and adapt positive behaviors like sensible eating, exercise, budgeting, and punctuality.

Studies show that people with high levels of self-discipline achieve more and are happier and healthier than people with less control. This self-help book tells readers how to dispel misconceptions about self-control and adapt new ways to meet the challenges of willpower.

You may learn, for example, that meditation is better than medication for reducing anxiety and strengthening your brain’s executive function. Regular physical exercise pays off by giving people a greater ability to curb other habits like smoking, overeating, and procrastinating. Breathing exercises, adequate sleep, and relaxation training also increase the ability to make better decisions that affect health and productivity.

McGonigal also addresses the cognitive and social aspects of self-control. He may be surprised that feeling too virtuous about his ability to avoid temptation in one instance (say, ordering salad) often leads him to give in to temptation later (ordering dessert). At the same time, self-criticism and shame over your indulgences only reduce self-control that much more.

Associating with friends and family who share your unwanted habit makes you more likely to engage in that habit. Likewise, if you want to start a new, healthy habit, hanging out with others who share your goal will provide social reinforcement. Maintaining an image of a future self enjoying the rewards of that new, healthy habit will strengthen your commitment.

Here are some other little nuggets from The Willpower Instinct:

• For most people, willpower is strongest in the morning.

• When it comes to maintaining a health habit, strive for small but consistent goals, rather than impressive accomplishments.

• The most effective strategies for relieving stress are exercising or playing sports, spending time with friends or family, getting a massage, going for a walk, attending a religious service, meditating or doing yoga, or spending time with a hobby.

• Trying to suppress recurring negative thoughts only exacerbates those thoughts and feelings. One remedy is not to suppress such thoughts, but to acknowledge them and remember that they are not necessarily valid. Tell yourself that this is how the mind works and that it means nothing.

I like everything about this highly readable book. Anyone who reads it will get at least one good idea to increase self-control.

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